So Verlander Has To Marry Kate Upton Now Right?

Every time I look at this picture I laugh harder than the last time.

So now that the dust has settled a little bit with the Fappening the biggest fall out has to be Justin Verlander and Kate Upton right? And more importantly the fact that Verlander has to marry Upton now. He has no choice. Think about it. Not only was it his phone that got hacked, revealing an insane amount of nude pictures of Kate Upton, but it also had a ton of road beef on their too. This has Kobe buying Vanessa Bryant an enormous ” sorry I raped someone” ring written all over it. That’s Verlander’s only move. He has to feel awful, he didn’t ruin Kate Upton’s life but it definitely won’t ever be the same. Add in the fact that he’s going to have a ton of questions to answer with the other chicks and he 100% is getting backed into an engagement corner. They’re forever linked together in the history of time. Can’t dump her and look like an asshole, can’t stay with her and not buy her a ring. Definition of a rock and a hard place (not that marrying Kate Upton is a bad thing by any stretch of the imagination). I give it no less than 3 months before they’re engaged. He has no other choice. And his ERA will probably never be the same.

PS

Good news is we got #Verlandering out of this whole thing, so that’s a win (not really).